Two adorable things to report on for today.
1. My daughter loves sports, but can't tell the difference between them. Tim was watching football today and Jenny called out, "Soccer!" No Jenny, it's not soccer. "Baseball!" she tries. "No, it's football, Jenny." Later that evening, she called it golf. My poor little girl, she's so confused.
2. Jenny thinks she's hott-stuff for being able to go up and down the step by herself. Not that she couldn't do it before, it's just that now she understands that we'll trust her to do it on her own, without the near heart attack ever time she comes near it. (We're over protective, dontchaknow?) So Jenny has made a little game out of it. It's a variation on the drop-see game (ya know I drop it, now I see you pick it up).
Anyway, Jenny grabs a soccer ball (a small squishy one) out of her playroom and proceed to figure out a dozen ways to put it through, under and over the gate and then says, "I get it. No worries." I'm laughing because she goes down the steps, retrieves the ball, returns upstairs and repeats this process, just so she can go up and down the steps getting this ball.
She's trying so hard to grow up so fast. All I can do is smile about the frustrating times and then let them be dissapated by the moments that make me laugh. I really do love that little girl.
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Jenny's day at the Renaissance Festival
September 24, 2011 - a beautiful, though overcast day. The weatherman told us there might be a few pop-up showers, but nothing to cancel our plans for. So we packed up the backpack, the big stroller, and headed off to Waynesville, Ohio.
Waynesville is about an hour's drive from our home and we made a short pitstop at Grandma's that morning before we headed off. Jenny was not very happy about leaving Maw-Maw's condo. Afterall, she's got great toys and a back patio where Jenny likes to pull leaves off the plants. Reluctantly, though, Jenny conceded to be strapped in. I think it was the promise of juice and fruit snacks, but that's just me.
Poor Jenny kept thinking we were going to the zoo and so got a bit fussy at the 45 min mark when she realized we weren't going to see the elephants today.
After parking in East-Jesus land, and the trek to the front gates, Jenny was almost already done. My dreams of a peaceful, fun-filled day didn't really come to fruition. Jenny didn't really want to shop or watch the shows and she was too little to ride the rides. Today was a day of temper tantrums and running away from us. Today was a rough day.
But there were cute moments too.
Like when Jenny smelled the incense oils with me. Or when she shied away from the woman with the lotion bar and clung to my leg for dear life. And the whole 30 seconds she wore the princess hat - she looked so cute in it, really. And when she picked out her guardian angel magnet for her room (the corner pieces are metal so the magnets stick to it). And when we were in the maze, trying to find our way out and when she slid down the slide to Tim.
And then when she conked out five minutes down the highway and slept until we got home.
Even on that little amount of sleep, she managed to do fairly well once we got home.
And now, with any luck, and all the prayers I can muster, I hope she sleeps well tonight.
As for me, I'm going to bed too.
Waynesville is about an hour's drive from our home and we made a short pitstop at Grandma's that morning before we headed off. Jenny was not very happy about leaving Maw-Maw's condo. Afterall, she's got great toys and a back patio where Jenny likes to pull leaves off the plants. Reluctantly, though, Jenny conceded to be strapped in. I think it was the promise of juice and fruit snacks, but that's just me.
Poor Jenny kept thinking we were going to the zoo and so got a bit fussy at the 45 min mark when she realized we weren't going to see the elephants today.
After parking in East-Jesus land, and the trek to the front gates, Jenny was almost already done. My dreams of a peaceful, fun-filled day didn't really come to fruition. Jenny didn't really want to shop or watch the shows and she was too little to ride the rides. Today was a day of temper tantrums and running away from us. Today was a rough day.
But there were cute moments too.
Like when Jenny smelled the incense oils with me. Or when she shied away from the woman with the lotion bar and clung to my leg for dear life. And the whole 30 seconds she wore the princess hat - she looked so cute in it, really. And when she picked out her guardian angel magnet for her room (the corner pieces are metal so the magnets stick to it). And when we were in the maze, trying to find our way out and when she slid down the slide to Tim.
And then when she conked out five minutes down the highway and slept until we got home.
Even on that little amount of sleep, she managed to do fairly well once we got home.
And now, with any luck, and all the prayers I can muster, I hope she sleeps well tonight.
As for me, I'm going to bed too.
New Book and Its Effect on my Motherhood
Women Food and God - Geneen Roth
Somewhere along the way, I stopped and stalled out. I don't know when and I'm not completely sure how, but I did. One day I may have a conversation with my mother and figure it all out, but for now, I look to the future. How will I be a good mom to Jenny?
I last wrote about how Jenny wasn't sleeping and I complained about what the lack of sleep was doing to all of us. But then my 2nd cousin had her baby and I find myself thinking back to when Jenny was first born - those long - very long - nights when she wouldn't settle herself down to sleep. The 3 am feedings when Jenny and I would sit and rock in the chair in the living room. I remember how exhausted I was and yet how thrilled I'd been to even have had her in the first place.
And so I find myself wondering again what this blog should really be about. I've been spending so much time fretting over myself and the difficult things going on in it. I think I want to spend more time writing about Jenny and what she's been up to.
I am fairly sure that no one will be reading this blog any time soon - there are more scandalous and fanatic things going on in the world and I am just one little mother / teacher / wife in that cacophonous mess of blogs.
My most recent literary purchase has left me wanting to make sure that Jenny grows up with a healthy understanding of herself and who she is. I guess I can hope to show her this blog some day, tell her about who she was and what she did and maybe help her find a little of herself, in case (like me) she ever forgets.
Somewhere along the way, I stopped and stalled out. I don't know when and I'm not completely sure how, but I did. One day I may have a conversation with my mother and figure it all out, but for now, I look to the future. How will I be a good mom to Jenny?
I last wrote about how Jenny wasn't sleeping and I complained about what the lack of sleep was doing to all of us. But then my 2nd cousin had her baby and I find myself thinking back to when Jenny was first born - those long - very long - nights when she wouldn't settle herself down to sleep. The 3 am feedings when Jenny and I would sit and rock in the chair in the living room. I remember how exhausted I was and yet how thrilled I'd been to even have had her in the first place.
And so I find myself wondering again what this blog should really be about. I've been spending so much time fretting over myself and the difficult things going on in it. I think I want to spend more time writing about Jenny and what she's been up to.
I am fairly sure that no one will be reading this blog any time soon - there are more scandalous and fanatic things going on in the world and I am just one little mother / teacher / wife in that cacophonous mess of blogs.
My most recent literary purchase has left me wanting to make sure that Jenny grows up with a healthy understanding of herself and who she is. I guess I can hope to show her this blog some day, tell her about who she was and what she did and maybe help her find a little of herself, in case (like me) she ever forgets.
Thursday, September 15, 2011
My creed
I will no longer torture myself with good foods and bad foods.
I will see the awesome power of the universe in the simple pleasures.
I will no longer treat myself unkindly, punishing myself for being wrong.
I will love myself.
I will no longer run from my emotions or worry that those emotions will destroy me.
I will retain my curious conversation with my inner self.
Because I believe
Worrying about what is inevitable will not make that moment any easier
Being worthy of this life and of the gift of this body are not things I can deny
I am the best at who I am - no one could do this better
Pain does not cause long-lasting change; only love can do that
I am not broken
I do not need fixing
My emotions will not destroy me
And most of all .. .
I believe that I AM WORTHY!!!
I will see the awesome power of the universe in the simple pleasures.
I will no longer treat myself unkindly, punishing myself for being wrong.
I will love myself.
I will no longer run from my emotions or worry that those emotions will destroy me.
I will retain my curious conversation with my inner self.
Because I believe
Worrying about what is inevitable will not make that moment any easier
Being worthy of this life and of the gift of this body are not things I can deny
I am the best at who I am - no one could do this better
Pain does not cause long-lasting change; only love can do that
I am not broken
I do not need fixing
My emotions will not destroy me
And most of all .. .
I believe that I AM WORTHY!!!
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
The Value of Sleep
I never thought I'd take sleep for granted nor did I ever think that sleep would be something I would be unable to live without or with very little.
So it took me five tries to write the above lines because I'm so very tired. Jenny hasn't been sleeping well lately and Tim and I can't figure out why.
And before you ask, yes, we've tried it; yes, we've read the book; yes, I ever asked my mother...
So last night when our exhaustion had hit its peak, we returned to the old stand-by. First Jenny and I read books for about 30 minutes until I thought she was tired enough. And then we said good night to everything in the room. And then we began the litany of other sleepers: Grandma's going night-night. Grandpa's going night-night. Aunt Natalie's going night-night. Uncle Chris is going night-night. Holly's going night-night. Gabby's going night-night. and on and on and on until I had named every family member I could and every one of you from Facebook. According to Jenny's bedtime routine last night, ya'll were going to bed.
And there was peace for 10 hours last night. Thank goodness for sleep.
So tonight, after a battling day at school, we did it again. Last night the routine took about 70 minutes. Tonight is was about an hour. I hope to get her down to 20 minutes just in time for the time change in October or November. Right now, I'm too tired to remember when daylight savings time begins.
So good night to all of you. If you ask Jenny, you're all in bed by now anyway.
I'm heading there now - I hope.
So it took me five tries to write the above lines because I'm so very tired. Jenny hasn't been sleeping well lately and Tim and I can't figure out why.
And before you ask, yes, we've tried it; yes, we've read the book; yes, I ever asked my mother...
So last night when our exhaustion had hit its peak, we returned to the old stand-by. First Jenny and I read books for about 30 minutes until I thought she was tired enough. And then we said good night to everything in the room. And then we began the litany of other sleepers: Grandma's going night-night. Grandpa's going night-night. Aunt Natalie's going night-night. Uncle Chris is going night-night. Holly's going night-night. Gabby's going night-night. and on and on and on until I had named every family member I could and every one of you from Facebook. According to Jenny's bedtime routine last night, ya'll were going to bed.
And there was peace for 10 hours last night. Thank goodness for sleep.
So tonight, after a battling day at school, we did it again. Last night the routine took about 70 minutes. Tonight is was about an hour. I hope to get her down to 20 minutes just in time for the time change in October or November. Right now, I'm too tired to remember when daylight savings time begins.
So good night to all of you. If you ask Jenny, you're all in bed by now anyway.
I'm heading there now - I hope.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
New book and I'm in love
Women, Food and Love by Geneen Roth
There are a myriad of reasons to love this book. I want to buy a thousand copies of this book and give them away to my friends and family and even to a few of my most loathsome enemies.
I love this book.
For those of us who have been torturing ourselves over the years because we've felt too ugly to too whatever to be worthy of breathing, this book tells us what we need to hear: I am not broken and there is nothing about me that needs to be fixed. And while this may be something many people take for granted, the complexity and depth of this issue has plagued everyone woman who has ever dieted. Ever.
We torture our bodies because we hope that we'll be happy. And truth be told, whatever we're trying to do with our bodies is not the thing that's going to make us happy. Happy comes first.
We have to learn to treat ourselves with the same compassion we would be treating anyone else who was torturing themselves - whether it was through drugs or suicide or guilt. When I read this and the entire logical reason people do this to themselves, I was amazed.
There are so many insightful things in this book and I can't help hoping that I can hold onto this lightness that seems to have filled me right now. If I can live a life of amazement, I think I can lose the weight (that which is truly weighing me down and that what is physically weighing me down as well) once and for all.
There are a myriad of reasons to love this book. I want to buy a thousand copies of this book and give them away to my friends and family and even to a few of my most loathsome enemies.
I love this book.
For those of us who have been torturing ourselves over the years because we've felt too ugly to too whatever to be worthy of breathing, this book tells us what we need to hear: I am not broken and there is nothing about me that needs to be fixed. And while this may be something many people take for granted, the complexity and depth of this issue has plagued everyone woman who has ever dieted. Ever.
We torture our bodies because we hope that we'll be happy. And truth be told, whatever we're trying to do with our bodies is not the thing that's going to make us happy. Happy comes first.
We have to learn to treat ourselves with the same compassion we would be treating anyone else who was torturing themselves - whether it was through drugs or suicide or guilt. When I read this and the entire logical reason people do this to themselves, I was amazed.
There are so many insightful things in this book and I can't help hoping that I can hold onto this lightness that seems to have filled me right now. If I can live a life of amazement, I think I can lose the weight (that which is truly weighing me down and that what is physically weighing me down as well) once and for all.
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